


Alfie Solomons Halloween Headcannons

by Higgles123



Series: Peaky Blinders and Tom Hardy Character Headcannons and Alphabets [15]
Category: Peaky Blinders (TV)
Genre: Children, Family, Halloween, mother bear alfie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:34:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27031252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Higgles123/pseuds/Higgles123
Series: Peaky Blinders and Tom Hardy Character Headcannons and Alphabets [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1971034
Kudos: 9





	Alfie Solomons Halloween Headcannons

  * Before Alfie had kids he thought Halloween was ridiculous. It was an excuse for snotty little brats in shitty costumes to come and beg for sweets without even doing any of the tricks that they were really supposed to do in order to get their treats. Before having kids, he would switch off all the lights and growl to himself whenever he heard another gaggle of little brats come walking up the path. _“What part of the lights bein’ off is a universally recognised sign not to fuckin’ knock do they not understand?”._



  * However once Alfie had his first child, his thoughts on the holiday changed dramatically. First of all, his baby dressed up like a little pumpkin was the absolutely hands down the most adorable thing he had ever been blessed to see with his two eyes. Literally she had been cute enough to eat and even though she didn’t have a fucking clue what was going on, Alfie still decorated the house and took about a thousand photographs of her with Cyril, who he had dressed up like a skeleton dog.



  * Now that he’s got a whole brood of nippers, Halloween is even more exciting because not only does he get to decorate the house and dress up the kids… he gets to go trick or treating as well! Yes, the thing that Alfie once abhorred with a passion has become his favourite thing to do every year!



  * So on the 1st October, the Halloween decorations go up because _“it’s absolutely never too early”_ , and every year it gets bigger and better than the previous year. Not only is the inside and outside of the house decorated, but the front garden is too. Anyone who walks past the Solomons’ house for the entire month of October can be guaranteed the fright of their lives, and Alfie absolutely loves peering through the curtains to catch a glimpse of people jumping with fright. Now the thing with Alfie though is that by the second week of October, the majority of people in the area are no longer frightened by the jump scares that pop up in the front garden, so Alfie takes it upon himself to make them even scarier. But of course in typical Alfie fashion, he has to go out and do it in the middle of the night so that no one can see what he’s doing. When his wife asks him if he doesn’t think this looks highly suspicious, he simply tuts at her and shakes his head. _“Love, I’m Alfie fuckin’ Solomons. The neighbours’ll probably just think I’m buryin’ a dead body or summit, so I wouldn’t worry.”_



  * Halloween comes (finally!) and Alfie is like a kid at Christmas. When the children get home from school (with Ollie’s kids too because they always spend holidays with the Solomons’), Alfie has already prepared dinner and it’s usually something grotesque looking like meatball eyeballs and bloody spaghetti worms, and then jellied brains and ice cream with candy bugs in for dessert. Then there’s games like bobbing for apples (although one year when Alfie’s eldest daughter peeled the skin from her apple- with help from her mother of course- and threw it back into the water, he was less than pleased to discover the letter ‘C’, which just happened to be the initial of Ollie’s oldest son’s name. It was then and there that Alfie decided it was a stupid game and there was no way girls ever married someone with the name of the initial they saw in the apple peel and he was putting a halt to the game before it gave certain children ideas), and there’s pass the parcel with spooky prizes to be won. Then there’s pumpkin carving and a little game that Alfie made called ‘pin the bolt onto Frankenstein’s neck’.



  * After all that wonderfully entertaining, and somewhat messy fun, the children get into their costumes and Alfie makes them pose for an absolute age while he gets a disgusting amount of pictures with them all pulling various faces. Once he’s satisfied he’s got enough pictures (well usually he has to stop because the smaller kids are getting antsy and crying or picking their nose etc) it’s time for them to leave. Now Alfie and Ollie are the ones to take the children trick or treating, because Alfie insists that his wife stay at home to hand out candy to children that come knocking at their door. Every year she asks why they can’t just leave out a huge bowl of candy and let the kids help themselves so that she can come too. And every year Alfie frowns and gives her the same answer. _“Right, if we leave a bowl of sweets out there, do you actually think they’re just gonna have self control and take one thing each? Cos let me tell you now that expectin’ kids to do that is like expectin’ Tommy Shelby to lose that dirty Brummie accent of his. It’ll never happen and also if it did, it would just be downright fuckin’ weird”._



  * Over the years, Alfie has worked out the best route to ensure that the children get to visit the houses with the best candy. It’s a the perfect route even if he does say so himself. At every house they go to, Alfie insists on walking to the door with the children; none of this waiting at the end of the path for them, and he’s horrified that Ollie would be willing to do just that.



__

_Alfie: You would be willing to send your children, your flesh and blood, the humans that are half of you, to their peril? You would send them into the unknown where they could face all kinds of dangers; they could be stolen, dragged into some madman’s house right before our very eyes._

_Ollie: They’re only knocking on old Mrs Emmerson’s door, Alfie._

_Alfie: You, Ollie, are fuckin’ shockin’. Call yourself a father? You disgust me._

  * Once the trick or treating is complete, the children arrive back at the Solomons’ and are eager to delve right into their candy, but before they can so much as eat one tiny piece, Alfie confiscates all of their little pumpkin buckets. One by one, he meticulously inspects each bucket’s contents to ensure there are no drugs, expired goods, unwrapped candies, weapons etc. The first year he had done this, his wife had rolled her eyes and told him he was a killjoy. _“Love, you aint as streetwise as me right, but I know for a fact there are people what hang outside schools givin’ little kids drugs what look like jelly sweets. So if you think about it, Halloween is the perfect time for these scum of the earth to get little kids hooked on drugs.”_



  * Goodies suitably checked, the children are given their buckets back and are free to begin the eating process. Both Alfie’s wife and Ollie’s wife try to limit how much the children have but Alfie won’t settle for that. _“Now who’s being the fuckin’ killjoy?”_. But then later on when it’s getting close to midnight and Ollie and his family left hours ago, Alfie regrets his earlier words because his own kids are high as fucking kites and he’s certain they’ll still be wide awake until next Halloween. And what does his wife do? Well, she smiles of course and says _“I told you so, Alf”_ as she climbs the stairs to bed and leaves him to deal with the kids. Happy Halloween from the Solomons!




End file.
